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Thursday, April 19, 2012

World English Dictionary
arachnophobia  (əˌræknəˈfəʊbɪə) 
— n
an abnormal fear of spiders
[C20: from Greek arakhnē  spider + -phobia ]
— adj , — n

Yes I have SEVERE arachnophobia. Severe. I tend to become a reduced puddle of hysterical tears when I see a spider. Especially very large ones. This morning was no exception to that. I was sitting in my bedroom checking emails on my laptop when my daughter Cheyenne screamed "OMG HUGE SPIDER! HUGE SPIDER!" You see, she has arachnophobia like I do. However, she tends to exaggerate on the size of spiders when she sees them. So I thought oh its probably just a small one. I got up to go see just how big the spider was. I didn't get very far. When I got to my bedroom door my son Dakota said "Don't move mom." I happened to look up at that moment and saw the biggest wolf spider I have EVER seen. Seriously. Really. I think it was on steroids. No really. It was...HUGE. Even with my fear of spiders and other arachnids, I have seen tarantulas that were smaller. Does that give you a good visual in your mind how big this thing was? Seriously. Tarantulas are big spiders. But this one...He had them beat in terms of size. Daniel and Dakota got to see just how bad my arachnophobia REALLY is. I started backing up, screaming, crying. I tripped and fell backwards over the edge of the bed. After landing on the floor I scooted backwards and screamed "Kill the damn spider. Kill it damn it."Daniel looked at me with this look that was pure shock at seeing his wife reduced to hysterical tears, shaking uncontrollably and unable to do much other than huddle into a ball. He knocked one of the legs off and the spider scurried off somewhere. It is now somewhere in my bedroom. Plotting my death. Seriously, I think it's plotting my death. I am not one to advocate violence but...I am terrified of spiders. Especially BIG ones. It triggered an SVT attack and a panic attack on top of that. Daniel was laughing his ass off but yet he felt totally horrible at the same time. He hugged me and said it will be okay baby. I looked at him like he was crazy and said "No it won't be okay. That spider is in my bedroom somewhere. Now go find it!". He laughed hysterically when I called my mama and said "I need to hear my mommy's voice."
 My mama immediately said "OMG What happened?" When I told her she said "oh crap!" She remembers all too well how terrified of spiders I am.  Daniel says I was holding Carsten (my puppy that is white mind you) so tight that his fur was turning blue. So I guess I can call him smurf puppy now? So that was my morning. How was yours?

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Another drive-by posting

 So last I posted I mentioned how stressful things were. Well here's a small bit of humor in the whole thing. On Thursday (4/5) we were sitting on our deck when we saw a woman stumbling down the road in front of the house. I wasn't going to give it any thought because it was obvious the woman was totally and utterly drunk out of her mind. That is until Cheyenne said OMG she has blood all over her face and shirt. So began the first bit of amusement. She stumbled onto our property and Dakota and I got her to sit down while I inspected the wounds. She was pretty tore up and had apparently walked about a mile or so in that condition. She didn't want us to call 911 so my son took the cell phone and went to the back of the property and called them. They showed up and apparently, she is a "frequent flyer" with them. By the time they convinced her to go to the hospital for stitches there was a Fire truck with lights going, Ambulance with lights flashing, a sheriff car, the volunteer FD vehicles and all my damn neighbors rubbernecking. When they finally convinced her to go she looked at me (keep in mind I have no idea who she is and had never met her nor seen her before) and she said "Youuuuuu! I will never speak to YOUUUUU again." I looked at Daniel and said "Alrighty then. Not like I know who the hell she is anyways." LOL

Fast forward to that weekend. It was either Friday or Saturday night at about 11:30pm. We are sitting on the deck with the grill going and I was reading Eldest to Daniel. We heard sirens in the distance and didn't think anything of it. That is until they came racing down the street and came to a stop in front of our property. Apparently they had gotten a call that our deck was on fire. It was...comical. Daniel told the chief "It's not on fire, we are sitting here with the grill like we have been for the last 3 or 4 nights." The chief said "Seriously?!?" Yeah that was comical. They turned the lights off and apologized for bothering us LOL.

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Just a quick Drive-by

 Well hello there my little stars and moons. I know, I know...where the Hades have I been right?!? I will tell you all about it next week. I promise. I am still sifting through the rubble trying to find my insanity. If you see my little insanity monster, will you tell her that she needs to come home. I feel lost without her. Oh and the cleaning fairy. They seemed to have run off together this time. I really miss them both.

     Shawnee is 14 now. Where has the time gone? I feel like all my babies are growing up way too fast. My youngest two are now 9. Quick! Someone loan me your newborn for a month. Please? Okay, okay, I know how hard it is to let go of that sweet smelling newborn phase. I won't badger you. Well, maybe just this >.< much. One of my Roosters died. As did my game hen. Cleopatra died from a heart attack that my son's dog gave her. I was so mad at that dog (she still gets the death glare and won't come near me because of it). Ra (the rooster) died from what we suspect was liver failure. And trust me when I say that is just the tip of the iceberg on the total insanity that has been taking a slow and leisurely walk through our house lately. The gardens are somewhat planted (yeah I'm slacking on that. Beat me with some whips will you? I need the enjoyment -wink-) and they are starting to look decent if you ask me. My roses are growing nicely and blooming. Well strike that. One of my bushes had a huge bloom that my children promptly beheaded. Yeah, we won't go there LOL. My allergies are saying screw you lady. We have had warm weather (I know, when do we not have warm weather in Florida right?) and I was telling my Daddy about it a few days ago. I was explaining how we haven't had a normal Florida winter and as a result of no cold weather, the fleas, ticks and such have not died down. So now I have to treat my yard and the dogs hard and heavy. Poor Bella barks (i.e talks) to her fleas, scratches, then whines at them and scratches some more before she growls at them. Poor Bella. I feel for her. Carsten is spoiled rotten. Boy you can tell he is my dog. He wants whatever I am eating and drinking. He gives the biggest puppy dog eyes I tell you.

     Well I am going to close this for now. I will be back soon enough. Love you all mucho grande.
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