Rambling

So we touched on the topics of Judgmental Parents, Family that doesn't act like family, pathological liars and divorce. All in the last week or so. I want to expand on a few of those topics in the upcoming weeks. But in the meantime,  As I sit here and scour through courses and options in terms of continuing my college education (Yes I am aware that I am an eternal student. And that I probably don't NEED yet another degree. But alas, I love school, what can I say?), I have found myself feeling conflicted. I had decided to take on a double major much to my Academic counselor's dismay. I don't think he was too happy when I changed my majors for the upteenth time, the last time I did. And I seriously doubt that he will be happy to hear I am once again toying with the idea of changing them...again. I am just having a seriously hard time deciding and sticking to it once the decision is made. And each time I change my mind, it sets my start date back even further. -sigh- Yes, I am aware that I just need to decide and then let it go. But I can't do that. I have never really been a "flighty" type of personality per say, but this is really making my head spin. I had no issues when I decided to get my Bachelors in Forensics. Or my Associates in Arts in Business. Nor when I went back and got my Bachelors in Multimedia Gaming and Graphics Design. And I knew I wanted my Bachelors in Fine Art & Photography. So why is it so d*mn hard to decide this time around?  I honestly don't know why it's so hard this time around. First I decided to further my Forensics degree by picking Forensic CSI Photography. But then I decided, why not just do Forensic Archaeology and Forensic Anthropology, with minor studies in CSI Photography and Pathology? Umm yeah, I have changed my mind once again and I can't seem to decide. I just feel like something is pulling me in a different direction, but I have no idea what it is and where it is wanting me to go. I have this unsettled and indecisive feeling this time. I hate it. I feel lost this time around. Which is unusual for me since I have always known what area of study I wanted and went for it. All I know is that I need to make up my mind or it's going to be too late. I just want it to be something that I will actually USE this time. Trust me, it's not a good thing to get a degree simply because your mother tells you that you can't do it......Yeah, I got my Forensics degree simply because my mother didn't have faith that I could do it. I was at a point in my life where I wanted to prove her wrong. However, I have always loved Forensics though.